Musings of a Mother

I’ll never forget the first time I thought about my kids leaving home. I think my oldes was around 14 or so. She was a goal setter, and she always seemed to achieve whatever she set out to do. She was always willing to try new things, even when they scared her. I was home alone on this day, thinking these things about her and how well I thought that she would get on as an adult.

All of a sudden, the tears just burst forth out of nowhere. I literally sat there and sobbed, just thinking about this time in the not even near future when she would leave me. Her entire life up to this point flashed before my eyes. Even I knew how crazy it was to be thinking and worrying about it then. And yet there I was.

I loved everything about my kids, loved being with them. I know it sounds corny, but it’s true…my greatest joy was watching them learn and grow into the amazing people they turned into. I couldn’t imagine not being with them every day. I started missing her before she even left.

And it was inevitable. All I could do was enjoy the rest of the time we had left. And I did. And you know what? I still enjoy every moment I’m with her today. No, I don’t see her or her babies nearly as much as I’d like. When I’m with them, though, it’s pure joy. I treasure every single moment.

I've created a life for myself, of course. I know they don't believe it, but my best times, even now that they've been out of the house so long, are still always with them. It's just different.